I’m sitting in the hospital with Nick. He started having chest pains so they are running lots of tests right now. As the seconds, minutes, and hours tick by I can’t help but wonder what I would do if he got sick. If he was admitted to the hospital. What I would do if I actually lost him. 

I can’t help but think about the last time I saw my mother smile, and that it potentially was the last time. Things like this really mess with my head, because it makes me realize how fragile life is. How quickly it can be here and gone. It make me want to be able to spend more time with my mom, but I also know that I can’t stand to see her that way either. 

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