In life and in relationships there are stepping stones that take you to the next level. If you fear taking the first step though you will simply never progress past it. In this lifestyle you will find there are many stepping stones that will take you on an unlimited amount of paths if you chose to explore them. For now I will speak of the path of a male submissive.
When I look at another man and see him as a “submissive”, I see someone who voluntary gives control of himself to another. He may be kneeling before them, worshipping with his eyes. He may be tied to a wall, crying in pain as they applies the lash. He may be taking their places, opening doors for them, recommending the best dishes in a restaurant. In all of these cases, the focus is all about his Dominant and their needs.
That doesn’t make him powerless or insecure. Submissive men are as knights, on bended knee, ready to slay dragons for them. I can honestly say that what I like most about a male submissive is that they are comfortable in who they are, and in owning their inner strength. They are secure in their submissiveness.
Dominants and relationships What does that mean? To start with, the relationship is going to be a 2-way street. You’ll need to understand their wants, needs, and dreams and be ready to meet those even as they comes to understand you and take control through your desires.
From here out, it’s like any other relationship — communication, honesty, flexibility, and patience are all keys to making it work. Except it’s also unlike any “vanilla” relationship in that you have to commit much more — more honesty and more vulnerability than all but the closest relationships.
I think that male submission is a powerful and loving way to be in a relationship. I love giving the best of my abilities to my submissive, of opening up and letting him stretch his limits. I love being strong for him, and of feeling new sensations and living through new experiences that excite us both. I also bring a strong spiritual and magickal orientation to my Dominance. It’s all to the same end — to set all I am, and all I can be, to another who revels in having their power given to me of their free will.
Side Note Their counterparts heterosexual cisgendered male Dominants look at a male sub as being a wimp, or a ‘less than manly’ thing. They feel jeopardized. I think it’s because men are often insecure, and seeing other men submitting to women or men makes them doubt that they can hold power over them. A lot of heterosexual cisgendered men feel that male submissives must be really, secretly gay….and homophobia is not uncommon even in the scene, and most heterosexual cisgendered male Dominants will avoid talking to them.
If you are incapable of standing up for yourself as a male submissive or a kneeling Dominant this isn’t the path for you.
I hope you will find what brings you joy, whether it be in a submissive relationship or not. You have been given the keys to this path, but it is your choice to unlock the door or walk away. Those are your only options though. You will not be permitted to stand forever at the door, and wonder what is on the other side. Eventually my patience will wane and you will be turned away.